Quest Friends!- Tales From the Beyond
Description: Things got strange after a billion years. Eight great societies rose and fell, alien visitors from across the universe found themselves Earth-bound, and sporks became the prominent form of silverware. But as much as things have changed, humanity hasn’t, fumbling along from self-made crisis to crisis in the way it always has. And like it always has, humanity faces these crises with the one hope that has never died: That maybe this time, we can get it right.
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Credits
“Friends” by Miracle Of Sound (YouTube: https://youtu.be/uH-8TDe5s-E, Bandcamp: https://miracleofsound.bandcamp.com/track/friends-2) “Derp Away” by Liam Priestnall: https://youtu.be/SLpef-yVKL4 “UI Completed Status Alert Notification SFX002.wav” by Headphaze: https://freesound.org/people/Headphaze/sounds/277032/ “menuDec.wav” by RunnerPack: https://freesound.org/people/RunnerPack/sounds/87032/ “Surreal State” by Jay Man/Our Music Box: www.youtube.com/c/ourmusicbox “Lobby Time” by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3986-lobby-time License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Transcript
Kyle
The Ninth World is an odd place; college airships manned by walruses, underground theme parks powered by death, the cities of The Steadfast are all rather strange. The Beyond is stranger.
[Opening theme, “Friends” by Miracle of Sound, begins.]
If you’re able to make your way east of the Black Riage, you’ll find The Beyond filled with an assortment of roadside attractions that will amaze and perplex in equal measure. Here, the dozens of skittering legs powering the Ladybug feel right at home. After all, in a land where the Iron Wind can reassemble your very molecules nothing can really be considered out of place. But as the weeks go on and the landscape continues to change at a dizzying pace, one thing in our view stays clear, a freakishly insectoid-like car carrying one small family as they try to find an artifact like nothing else. Unfortunately, in The Beyond, that’s like finding a needle in a haystack.
[Opening theme plays out and shifts to a radio version.]
Kyle
So you are all on a road trip! Woo! You’re on your college break. Break ended early for you after college and now you all are going on a road trip to stop the apoc-rid-alypse.
Tom
[Uneasily.] Yeah…
Kyle
The apocalypse-rita…
Ari
Apocrilips. There we go.
Kyle
So, what this is gonna happen, this is gonna happen very similar to your episode in Fasten. Getting from Zhev Gardens to the eastern edge of the Ba-Adenu Forest is not a small task. As much as the little legs of the Ladybug are going step-step-step as hard as they can, it’s gonna take you a few weeks to get there, and during that time you’re going to go through The Beyond. The Beyond is where Elee’s Memory largely took place. It is a strange place. It’s basically the wilderness. It’s the tundra! Before the session started I described it to everyone as driving through rural Iowa. It’s a lot of emptiness, a few small towns that each have their own quirks, and then occasionally just the world’s biggest ball of yarn, except in the Ninth World that yarn is probably snakes and will eat you.
Tom
[Chuckles.]
Kyle
So, as I said—
Emily
The world’s biggest wheel of eels.
Hallie
[Giggling.] Wheeeels!
Tom
Well, we’re off to a good start.
Kyle
So, as I said, the way this is gonna run is similar to Tales from Fasten. Each of you is gonna have a small scene that you can do basically what you’ve been up to, a noticeable thing that’s taken place between now and when you get there in a few weeks. Now for those people who like drama, we can imagine the drama’s happening in the background, we’re not gonna get too into it this episode, because we’ve kind of had a tough memory episode behind us—
Tom
Let me brood, dad.
Kyle
And then a tough present arc coming before us.
Ari
I want to say for the audience that even though you have heard this episode, I as a player have not played this episode yet so I am very scared of whatever you guys just know that I don’t know.
Tom
Ooh boy.
Kyle
And I’ve talked to you a little bit about what you wanna be doing during this trip, and Elee, I hear you’ve been worrying.
Emily (as Elee)
[Stressed] Hopper! Hopper?
Hallie (as Hopper)
Yeah?
Emily
Um. Elee is in the back of the Ladybug gesturing for Hopper to come out of earshot of Xoc and Misha.
Kyle
And also out of earshot of the giant, mountainous ears. You’ve just made it on the other end of the Black Riage and some of the mountains you can see have a giant ear-like shape and funnel in a lot of sounds.
Ari
[Laughter.] Oh my fucking god.
Kyle
So you can hear them twitch a little bit.
Ari
That’s so disgusting.
Emily
[Grossed out wavering noise.] Always have to have body horror, I guess.
Tom
Yeah, gotta get it out early. It’s for the best.
Hallie
Hopper was reading a book. He will put it down and join Elee.
[Quirky music begins.]
Emily (as Elee)
[Growing progressively more nervous.] So, um, you know sometimes, um, I don’t always 100% know how to, um… “parent.” Xoc and Misha, um, you… they… Do we need to talk to them? Do they need like a curfew, or do we need to split up the, split up the Ladybug for sleeping purposes? I’m really not sure how to handle this and I’ve been thinking about it a lot.
Hallie (as Hopper)
I don’t know if you need to handle it. I don’t think there’s anything to handle. I mean, they–
Hallie
Looks back at Xoc and Misha. What are they doing?
Ari
I wanted to say that on the background… I mean, I think it would be better if Xoc was doing it, but if not, Misha has their head on Xoc shoulder.
Tom
I was thinking the same thing, that Misha’s driving and Xoc has fallen asleep on Misha’s shoulder.
[0:05:00]
Ari
[Gleefully..] yes. Oh my god.
Emily
Elee gestures with both hands out, like, see?!
Hallie
Hopper gives a soft smile at seeing them cuddling together.
Hallie (as Hopper)
I think they’ll figure out whatever they need to figure out when the time is right. I mean, I don’t—
Emily (as Elee)
But they kissed! And last time I kissed a man…I got him pregnant!
Kyle
[Bursts into laughter.]
Emily
[Giggles.]
Hallie
Hopper thinks about this… looks back at Xoc and Misha, looks back at Elee… keeps thinking about it, and says,
[Others continue laughing throughout.]
Hallie (as Hopper)
I know that was a surprise to you, and I think they should be, um, [strangled] safe in… whatever they do, but—
Emily (as Elee)
Do they know things?! Do I need to tell them things?!
Hallie (as Hopper)
I, I–No. They don’t know things, I can say that for pretty certain.
Emily (as Elee)
[Flustered.] I didn’t know things either, and I’m just not sure if maybe we should, um, if we need to tell them things before they need to know things.
Hallie (as Hopper)
What would you tell them?
Emily (as Elee)
I don’t know!
Hallie (as Hopper)
I, I…
Hallie
Hang on. Let me check an inventory that I have.
Tom
[Coughs laughing.]
Hallie (as Hopper)
Look, if you’d like, I can check out a new book from Library Access tomorrow. Maybe there’s one on how to talk to androids about… things, and also humans about things.
Emily
[Laughter.]
Hallie (as Hopper)
There’s gotta be a book that has both of that, right? If you really want to. I mean, again, I don’t think it’s any of—
Emily (as Elee)
Maybe we should just check out the book and then, like, put it where they’ll find it.
Hallie (as Hopper)
They’re going to ask you questions, though.
Emily (as Elee)
Well, I just don’t, um, want to be aggressive about it. I just want to make sure that I don’t end up as a grandmother.
Ari
Oh my god. This is how fan fiction… Bring in the fan art I guess.
Emily
Elee has spiraled. You need to understand.
Hallie
Hopper, sensing Elee just completely spiraling, will put two hands on her shoulders and say,
Hallie (as Hopper)
Listen, listen, everything will be fine. I don’t think that’s going to be an issue, but we can do some research and figure out if it is, and if it will make you feel better we can talk to them.
Emily (as Elee)
[Nervously.] Okay.
Hallie (as Hopper)
But I really don’t think it’s–I don’t think you need to be worrying.
Emily (as Elee)
Okay. Um. Let me just hype myself up and then I’ll get it all out. Um… Xoc, Misha.
Tom (as Xoc)
Hmm?
[Comical piano music begins.]
Hallie (as Hopper)
[Frantically] Oh, it’s happening now! I didn’t mean it’s happening now. I meant let’s read a book and then talk to—
Hallie
You could keep talking, but Hopper’s gonna keep talking over you.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Oh! It’s happening now. I didn’t think that it would ever… happen… but it’s happening now.
Kyle
[Laughter.]
Ari (as Misha)
Did you say something, Elee B?
Emily (as Elee)
[Flatly.] Yes. I said… your names.
Ari (as Misha)
Oh.
Tom (as Xoc)
What’s wrong?
Emily (as Elee)
Um. Sometimes when people love- or like each other very much, or sometimes just meet and think that they look nice… they do things, and then, um, don’t have babies. Don’t. Hopper’s gonna give you a book!
Ari (as Misha)
Uh…
Hallie (as Hopper)
Oh my god.
Hallie
That’s in character. [Into her hands.] Hopper’s face is in his hands now.
Emily
And then she’s gonna, like, squish up her shoulders into kind of her hat and just sidle behind Hopper.
Tom (as Xoc)
If you’re talking about sex, I know what that is.
Emily (as Elee)
What?!
Hallie
Hopper looks up from in between his hands and just stares at Xoc.
Ari (as Misha)
Is, is it the same as kissing? Is it the same as what we did back in the Prodigious?
Emily (as Elee)
[Despairing.] Kissing leads to the dark times!
Hallie (as Hopper)
Alright, you know what, just- [Clears throat.] Misha, do you remember when we were in that Roulettia hotel room and you asked why there would only be one bed for two people?
Ari (as Misha)
Oh. Yes, I am still a little bit confused about it.
Hallie (as Hopper)
It’s for human reproduction purposes.
[Group descends into laughter and coughing.]
Ari (as Misha)
I will make sure to look extensively into this in the Datasphere.
Hallie (as Hopper)
You can if you’d like, but also, if you have any questions about anything at any time, you can ask—
[Quirky music ends.]
Emily (as Elee)
You can ask Hopper!
Hallie (as Hopper)
Me.
[Laughter.]
Emily (as Elee)
Speaking of which, Hopper Scotch.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Why are you looking at me like that?
Emily (as Elee)
You sit five feet apart from Sera, you understand me?
Hallie (as Hopper)
Well Sera’s not here.
Emily (as Elee)
No. later on, when you go back to see her, because I know you will.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Yeah, but why… What?
Emily (as Elee)
Just, you were talking, and then I started thinking about that, and, and, and honestly I don’t know whether I should talk to you about not hurting her or her not hurting you. And…
Hallie (as Hopper)
[Earnestly.] I would never hurt Sera.
Ari, Kyle and Emily
Aww~!
Emily
Elee having finished spiraling and then just hearing that, will just like flump onto him and then like pretend
[0:10:00]
that she wasn’t hugging, pat his back, and go sit a little bit scrunched up back to where she was.
[Typewriter noises.]
Kyle (as **Q-BO)
Calculations finished. I have 13,469 articles related to the topic of sex.
[Party fights to resist laughing.]
I will list them in alphabetical order so you know which one is the most beneficial one for you.
Emily (as Elee)
Q-BO, no!
Tom
[Laughter.]
Ari (as Misha)
[Innocently.] Please proceed.
[Laughter.]
Kyle
And we move on.
Ari
Yes.
Kyle
We move on. We’re further out in The Beyond. It’s a few days later. If we’re looking through the car we can see that Elee is now reading a book on robot adolescence, ‘Your Static Body and You.’ We’re tiering up. We are now level 5, the second-to-last tier. So what new skills and new abilities, abilities being unique things you can do, does Elee now have?
Emily
So, the only one that I cared about was the special one that I picked that you told me I couldn’t pick last time, which was Experienced Defender, because it gives me +1 to Armor.
Hallie and Tom
[Chanting.] Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it!
Emily
[Fighting giggles.] And I did it just because I knew it would make you mad. I didn’t even need it!
Tom
[Whispering coercively.] Do it.
Kyle
… So, we move on from Elee. [Chuckles.] We can see in the center of the Ladybug, potentially even on the top of the vehicle, Ness triumphantly slaps two cards on the ground in front of Xoc.
Hallie (as Ness)
I’ve got a pair.
Tom (as Xoc)
I don’t know if I actually have anything. Do you have any fives?
Hallie (as Ness)
Any fives… Go fetch.
Tom (as Xoc)
[Disappointed.] Ohh.
Tom
And Xoc gets up slightly to go draw another card from the deck. So, I imagine what happened was Xoc was just sort of absent-mindedly staring off into the distance and playing with his cards that he uses for magic tricks, just messing around with them, not actually doing anything specific, when Ness came up and suggested they do something more interesting with the cards.
Hallie (as Ness)
This is boring.
Tom (as Xoc)
Well—
Hallie (as Ness)
Is it a game?
Tom (as Xoc)
No. I use these to train my magical abilities.
Hallie (as Ness)
Wow. That sounds really, really, really not interesting. What if we played a game?!
Tom (as Xoc)
[Nonchalantly.] Okay.
Hallie
[Laughter.] And that was how it went, just okay!
Tom (as Xoc)
What games do you know?
Hallie (as Ness)
All of them. I know Wickersnackers, and Mama Knows, and…
[Laughter.]
Tom
Cutting back I guess to their round of Go Fetch, Xoc says,
Tom (as Xoc)
You know, I, thank you for coming with us. It means a lot to me.
Hallie (as Ness)
[Flatly.] Why?
Tom (as Xoc)
Because we’re on a dangerous journey. We left behind most of the people we know and love.
Hallie (as Ness)
I didn’t really know them.
Kyle
[Laughter.]
Tom (as Xoc)
That’s true. I just… I appreciate that you are willing to stick with us even though we’re driving off into The Beyond and I have already failed to help you out once when you were on your own.
Hallie (as Ness)
Why did you take me from Qi?
Tom (as Xoc)
You mean off the street?
Hallie (as Ness)
Yeah.
Tom (as Xoc)
You were hurt. You needed help.
Hallie (as Ness)
Yeah, but like, what does it matter to you?
Tom (as Xoc)
I mean, you were hurt. I didn’t wanna leave someone, just, alone. I, uh…
[Nostalgic string music begins.]
I know it’s kind of, kind of awful to be left on your own, so I wanted to help you.
Hallie (as Ness)
Do you have any nines?
Tom (as Xoc)
Yeah, I got two of them here.
Hallie (as Ness)
If you have two of them you have a pair. Why isn’t it down on the table?
[Laughter.]
Tom (as Xoc)
I feel like I misunderstood the rules of this game.
Hallie (as Ness)
[Aggressively.] The rules are if you have two of something you put them down on the table! They’re very simple, Xoc. You would not last in the Qi underground playing Go Fetch for your livelihood, like I have done.
Kyle
And so, they continue to play through the night and through the morning, Xoc not really understanding and Ness, despite being the kind of person who would claim he would take that to his advantage, always actually helping Xoc out with the rules.
[Nostalgic music ends.]
And during this time, Xoc, I don’t know, a screen pops up, something tells us what your new abilities are. Tell me about your new abilities.
Tom
So Xoc, in between, you know, the riveting rounds of Go Fetch and staring out the window definitely not brooding, he’s actually been busy working. Two things specifically.
[Mystical choral music begins.]
Ever trying to increase his spellbook, he grabbed a bit of Argent from the wreckage and has been trying to extract some of its properties. The full abilities of Argent are something probably well-beyond Xoc at this point, but he did manage to sort of extrapolate a rather interesting space ability even though the time powers aren’t quite working out just yet. So Xoc has gained the ability Teleportation. I now have the ability to instantaneously transmit myself to any location that I have seen or been to, no matter the distance.
[0:15:00]
Instead of applying Effort to decrease the difficulty I can instead apply Effort to bring other people with me, with each level of Effort bringing up to three additional targets, which is quite handy for our party size. I think that out of character we had ruled that this takes time to build up, say ten minutes or so.
[Mystical music ends.]
Kyle
Yeah, so the changes are, it doesn’t cost a whole lot more to bring more people, because you have four other people with you. Don’t forget about Ness.
Hallie (as Ness)
I exist!
Tom
If he hides in my pocket we get in free.
Kyle
[Laughs.] And then, yeah, we argued that it takes about ten minutes.
Tom
Yes. We’ve unlocked fast travel.
Kyle
Basically, yeah.
Tom
We can go back anywhere we’ve been. As Xoc works on this, he’ll probably have mentioned at some point to the rest of the party,
Tom (as Xoc)
Teleportation, that way, if we really need to, we can get back to some place we’ve been, really fast.
Hallie
Hopper would be like,
Hallie (as Hopper)
You extracted that from Argent?
Tom (as Xoc)
Yes and no. I took pieces of it and used it with the connection I already have with my Nano Spirits and we took something of that, made a new chip for my spellbook.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Huh.
Hallie
He will get out his little atlas book and he’s gonna scribble that down and mutter to himself, something like,
Hallie (as Hopper)
[Quiet, inwardly.] Maybe Sera could fix it.
Tom
Then my other main ability, coming from my focus, is that he vaguely remembers, distantly as a child, having something like this before where when he spoke it was to a lot of people all at once, but he was eventually taught to be quieter–
Ari
Aww.
Tom
–and not bother everyone all the time.
Tom
But now Xoc can send out a lot more feelers at once. Specifically, this is the ability Information Gathering. He can speak telepathically with any or all machines within one mile, or 1.6 kilometers, and can ask one basic question about themselves or anything happening near them and receive a simple answer. Like, say, if you were looking for someone or something specifically you could ask “where is this” and if a creature is near, one or more machines probably have the answer.
Emily
That’s fun.
Hallie
Neato.
Kyle
And also during this time, a skill is building. Each night, each pass of the Go Fetch cards, Xoc is learning something else.
Tom
Yes. So, in those last few minutes before the party left Zhev Garden, Xoc spoke to Mayra and Sunny because they specialized in the mind, asking them if they knew any techniques that he could use to defend his mind against forcible control by Loell so that could never happen again. And while they couldn’t obviously give him a lot of direct instruction they told him how he could practice.
Kyle
They had mentioned specifically that, Sunny had said she can never get a read on Goldstone.
[Others start suppressing giggles.]
It always felt like he was thinking about some sort of inane nonsense, like running through Powerball numbers in his head at all times.
Ari
Oh my god.
Kyle
Trying to calculate probabilities that did not exist, that sort of thing.
Tom
And so, the technique that Xoc is building is a technique essentially of counting his Go Fetch cards, keeping this mundane routine in the back of his head to serve as a sort of shield and help him better resist Loell’s control in the future. That’s my skill. I’m trained in “resisting telepathic intrusion” I think is the wording we decided on.
Kyle
And Ness has no idea when after the last round he turns to Xoc and says,
Hallie (as Ness)
Look, I can’t really say I’ve hit the lottery with weird wizard kid, confused android, sad cowboy, and metal old lady… actually she’s pretty cool, I’ll give metal old lady a pass. You have one cool friend, two cool friends, because Misha is nice.
[Peaceful acoustic guitar music begins.]
But, if these are the cards that I have, then I don’t mind playing them. I have a pair.
[Music continues for a few more seconds with finger snapping along.]
Kyle
[Hums a percussive jingle.] Hello, and welcome to the announcement break for Quest Friends, Episode 58! Whoa, I just almost said Crime and Courtship. We’re not doing that anymore. Episode 58, Tales from The Beyond. No parts, this is a single-parter, it’s a transition episode. I am Kyle, your GM, and our intro song is ‘Friends’ by Miracle of Sound.
Jumping straight into things today, we’ve got a Patreon shout-out from an NPC, so without any further ado I will let the NPC do the shout-out.
[0:20:00]
Kyle (as Vespari)
This is The Great Vespari’s time to shine! You see, I, The Great Vespari was requested by Patreon backer Bee who you can find at @ilgakasa on Twitter and Tumblr. That’s spelled I-L-G-A-K-A-S-A. And Bee wants me to remind everyone that in these hazardous times it’s important to stay safe, check up on your loved ones, and if you do have some extra time that you’re just not sure what to do with, trying a new hobby or skill such as magic tricks – or pyromancy – is a fantastic way to help use some of that time. But of course, it’s important to remember that these kinds of things should be only done for yourself, and if you find yourself unable to be “productive” that is no way a failing on yourself. Do what is best for you, which includes most importantly of all to wash your hands for 20 seconds after being outside.
Oh, and I’m supposed to say ace and aro rights. Of course! Ace and aro rights!
Kyle
Emily, uh… Well, okay, thank you Vespari, but also importantly, I could hear Emily “woo” at that last comment from across the, like, entire apartment which makes me realize just how loud I am now at 11:55 at night, two hours after our quiet times at the apartment. Hope the neighbors—The neighbors are definitely used to it at this point.
Thanks again so much, Bee, for supporting us on Patreon. Again, these NPC shout-outs go to any subscriber on Patreon.com/QuestFriends who subscribes at a $5 level or above. But you know all about our Patreon, we had a special episode about it last week, we mention it a few times in this episode, and so while I always would absolutely love it if you could support us on Patreon, and I think we have the content to really justify those subscriptions, I know that’s not an option for everyone. So I would also encourage you to take a look at the links below and if you can’t follow us on Patreon take a look at our social media, specifically our Facebook, our Twitter, and our Tumblr, and if you use any of those social medias, just follow along.
For the upcoming arc, actually for a session that we’re recording on the 13th, I’m gonna be doing something pretty special, and to make sure I don’t just limit it to one social media like I did for the NPC Showdown I’m gonna have this be open on all social medias, so it will be available on Facebook, on Twitter, on Tumblr. There might be a non-social media option, but if you follow us on one of our social media handles – again, that’s Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr – you’ll be able to learn about this listener input thing I’m doing pretty much as soon as possible.
Alright, that’s all I’ve got for you today. Our next episode, One Neon Night, Part 1, will be releasing in two weeks on Monday, June 8th. I’ll see you then.
[Acoustic guitar music and snapping returns for a few seconds with some humming.]
Kyle
Alright, so Hopper, we’re gonna talk about all the ways you lose Might points over these couple of weeks.
Hallie
Yeah.
Ari
Oh nooo!
Emily
[Distraught].] Hopper!
Tom
[Laughing.] Oh god, why?
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Kyle
An error when putting on the defibrillator accidentally just cuts you in the finger a little bit. It’s like a paper cut.
Hallie
Cool.
Kyle
There was the time you went through the desert and there were just the little mole snakes that started poking out of the ground. They got one of the tires. You volunteered to fix that.
Tom
T-Tires?
Kyle
Sorry. They got one of the legs. You volunteered to repair that and lost a boot in the process.
Hallie
Did I get it back?
Tom
No-no, I think we just expanded on the canon.
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Tom
There are rubber boots on the bottoms of these legs that we call “tires.”
[Laughter.]
Ari
Did you mean to say there was a snake in that boot?
Hallie
[Shrieks, laughs, and taps desk in excitement.] No!
Kyle
So we got snake boots, we got mechanical issues, and let’s not even get started on the sand sirens, but there’s been a different project during all this time, during all these weeks, that has been taking up most of Hop’s Might and most of his Intellect points. Before we get to that, I want to talk about what some of your level-ups are.
[Groovy elevator music begins.]
So, while working on this project, you have been able to use Mako’s defibrillator arm. It has a few benefits. Normal combat with your fists is one step easier.
[0:25:00]
Just punching someone with your fist is one step easier.
Hallie
Okay.
Kyle
It has the ability to shoot enemies at long range. This is a concise beam. This is like a sniper shot, basically.
Hallie
Okay.
Kyle
Additionally, when you put it on, it helps with small basically sleight of hand things that require maneuvering with your one hand. In addition to having things helping with getting rid of the spiders Mako has also put in the MO-S, the Mako OS, or MOS, and the MOS system, it’s like your Iron Man and he’s your Jarvis. Not as complicated, it’s not a full operating system, but it does have a fair amount of information in it. So you have that, that’s a new item that you have. I hope you wrote down all the rules because I did not.
Hallie
I just did.
Kyle
But what are the other skills and abilities you’ve been getting over this time?
[Elevator music fades out.]
Hallie
Well, my tier level-up gets me an ability called Punish All The Guilty!
Kyle
[Laughs.]
Hallie
Anyone that I designate as guilty, and I can designate multiple people—
Kyle
And now you can have the Mako visor yell at everyone being guilty.
Kyle (as The Defibrilimb)
You are all guilty, friends!
Hallie
Oh my god, I can! I could have the Mako visor!
Tom
Holy shit, like locking in a bunch of targets?
Hallie
God! Yes! Locking in a bunch of targets, because I can attack all foes within immediate range that I have designated as guilty.
Tom
Holy shit. That’s a lot of attacks if we get into a scrum.
Hallie
I’m so excited. Additionally, I have an ability called Snipe—
Ari
[Chuckles.]
Hallie
Where if I spend one action aiming and the next round I can make a precise ranged attack. The difficulty of the attack is decreased by one step and it inflicts 4 additional points of damage to whatever the weapon that I’m using is.
Ari
It’s hiiigh noon~
Hallie
[Thrilled.] It was meant to be! Yes.
Kyle
[Laughs.]
Hallie
I think that’s it for me.
Kyle
You get a skill as well.
Hallie
Oh right. I opted, instead of a new one, I made myself specialized in pleasant social interactions and persuasion.
Kyle
Okay, pleasant social interactions and combat, and neither of those have been very useful to you on this trip.
Hallie
[Disappointed.] No.
Kyle
Admittedly, when the things started to attack the Ladybug that was helpful. There were many, many guilty sand moles that day.
Hallie
So many.
Kyle
And also again, those sand sirens man, just a headache to deal with. [Laughs.] But what has Hop been doing in between all of these mini-adventures that he seems to be going on by himself?
[Trails into giggling at the end.]
Hallie
[Laughs.] Just like no one else is around. In addition to these adventures that he apparently experiences alone, mostly at night when they have some downtime he has been sort of sneaking off to do a thing. Relevant, I made my Flex Skill DIY Projects.
Kyle
[Laughs.]
Ari
[Giggling.] What?
Hallie
But I can make that a real thing if you want, like—
Kyle
No, Flex Skill is fine. Flex Skill every day. Hop’s just gotten a new hobby for three weeks.
Hallie
Yeah basically, and he’s using the new defibrillator arm to help with the smaller, more precise tasks, and he has also been reading a book that he got from Library Access called ‘Building Safety Codes, In Miniature.’
[Laughter.]
And he consults it a lot, because he wants the ant farm that he is making for Misha to be safe for the ants.
Ari
[Excited squeaking through incoherent words..] –ant farm!
Emily
[Long gasp of wonderment.]
Hallie
And he does not have a lot of knowledge on building things, so he is really trying to make it good.
Kyle
[Speechless, impressed exhale.]
Ari
[Extended happy croon throughout.] Oh my god. Oh! You’re making a little house so that they’re not in a ball all the time. Aww.
Tom
[Breathy, deeply moved.] Oh my god…
Kyle
And I’d imagine in some of your more frustrated moments you’ll look to that object that Sera gave you when she said you could ask for help and be like—
Hallie
Absolutely.
Kyle
[Pitched high, unsure.] Should I?!
Hallie
He thinks about it. He reaches for it at one point and then… doesn’t, and he just kind of mutters to himself under his breath, trying to remember anything that Sera said to him at any point on the Prodigious that would help him with this specific project.
Kyle
And so, how is this project going?
Hallie
You know, not as bad as it could. Like, Hop, he’s been reading a lot during the day, and he’s got Mako’s MOS system to help him out. It only goes so far, but it helps him stabilize things and see like
[Slowly grasping for jargon.] …force vectors… I don’t know, things that you use in building things.
Tom
[Coughs laughing.]
Kyle
And so, it’s one night before dinner. You manage to sneak off and start working on this project. You are right by- What big The Beyond thing are people by? What’s a cool thing we are by?
Hallie
[With a silly inflection that changes how it sounds.] A water park.
Kyle
Okay. [Laughs.] You’re by the water perk.
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Kyle
[Grinning.] A water park exclusive to Patreon subscribers.
Hallie
[Laughs heavily into her hands.]
Tom
[Grinning.] God damn it.
[Upbeat commercial music begins.]
Which you can support us on Quest Friends at Patreon.com—
Hallie
You too can go to the water perk.
Emily
It’s one of the only places you can get a good old fashioned ballperk hatdag.
Kyle
[Laughs.] So, you’re right next to the water perk, and you finish it.
[Commercial music ends.]
At least you think you do.
Hallie
He’s not sure. So he studies it a lot, and he goes to maybe tweak a thing, and then doesn’t wanna tweak the thing in case he ruins the thing. So he took a while to think about it, but he was like no, I guess it’s done. So he’s holding it behind his back and he’s like,
[0:30:00]
Hallie (as Hopper)
[Clears throat.] Um, hey, Misha? Are you busy?
Ari (as Misha)
Oh! Hello Simon Scotch. No, I am never busy for a friend.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Um… I know that I thanked you for my hat, but—
Ari (as Misha)
It looks very good on you by the way.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Thank you. I really love it, and it really helped me out, even though it didn’t seem like it at the time. So, I um.
[Clears throat.] I know that you have these balls of ants, and I don’t know if the balls are viable for long-term storage or how they work, so I thought, you know, maybe they’d like a different home.
[Sweet and gentle music begins.]
Hallie
He takes it out from behind his back and holds it, and before Misha can even respond he’s already like,
Hallie (as Hopper)
[Nervously rambling a little.] I made it myself without Sera’s help, or anybody knowledgeable, so I don’t actually know if it’s safe. You might wanna just keep the ants in the balls. I don’t know. Maybe they’re happy there, maybe it is viable long-term storage, but maybe they want to shake things up. Maybe they want it to be different. I don’t know!
Kyle
And, an ant is already inside of it.
Ari
[Smiling.] Yeah, that’s what I was gonna say. I was gonna say that Misha was going to like slightly push–off camera just put the balls inside the farm as Hop was talking and they were just going all at it, like they were all about that life in the farm.
[Giggling.]
Hallie
The woods.
Kyle
What does the ant farm look like?
Ari
The ant farm, I was thinking it looks like a little house but like big, big for ants, not necessarily big. But like, it has glass and it has a lot of different tunnels and things that they can dig in, and it’s full of dirt. But I was imagining that it has some things that maybe Hop thought were unfinished things but work as like slides?
Hallie
[Delighted yelp.]
Ari
And like things for the ants to, like, just have fun in them?
Hallie (as Hopper)
That’s a laundry chute. I didn’t know if they needed to do laundry.
Emily
[Laughs.]
Kyle
It’s their own water perk.
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Ari
Yeah, Misha’s going to be really excited and say,
Ari (as Misha)
Oh! I was worried about the ants myself, because I also felt like they weren’t really happy just in the ball, and I was thinking of ways to make them happier, and this is just perfect, Simon Scotch. This is one of the best gifts I’ve ever received in my life.
Hallie (as Hopper)
I’m glad you like it.
Ari (as Misha)
I do, and I think my ants like it too. Thank you very much.
Hallie (as Hopper)
You’re welcome.
Hallie
He like holds it out.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Oh! And another thing—
Hallie
Um, Kyle, we had talked about this but not in a while because I just remembered it. Sera’s got those mini things.
Kyle
Yeah, things that makes things bigger or small. They don’t have a name.
Hallie
Mini dots! That’s what we’ll call them.
Ari
Ohhh.
Hallie (as Hopper)
Sera made these. I have one on my shield so I can keep it in my pocket and then make it bigger when I need. So I thought if we attached this to the ant farm it could fit in your pocket like the balls did.
Ari (as Misha)
Oh! They will be even smaller ants.
Emily
[Giggles.]
Tom
Aw.
Ari (as Misha)
I really like this, Simon. Thank you very much.
[Sweet music ends.]
Ari
I’d like to have it, maybe Misha will put it, like if there’s some way to pin it or something so that they have it hanging by where, like—
Hallie
If they try to do that Hop will pull a safety pin out of the little office compartment in his hat.
Ari
Aw!
Hallie
And he’ll hand it to Misha to be able to.
Ari
[Delighted.] Yes!
Kyle
And the scarf will keep it safe and snug if you pin it at the scarf.
Ari
[Squeaking with joy.] Oh my god, yes, it will be pinned in the scarf!
Kyle
The scarf does not mind. The scarf is a little hesitant when it sees the pin at first, but then it relaxes and, it’s like, it’s a scarf, the pin won’t hurt it.
Ari
Yeah.
Kyle
So it keeps the little ant farm safe and sound.
Ari
Misha will, in any case, pet the scarf a little bit as they are putting the pin to let it know that it’s okay.
Emily
This is adorable.
Kyle
Alright, so Hopper, Misha, and Misha’s house of ants – which sounds like a really bad sitcom.
Ari
What is this, a farm for ants?
Hallie
[Putting on an old, ornery voice.] What, ants?!
Kyle
All make their way to dinner. Who cooks? Do any of you cook? Can any of you cook? Who cooks?!
Ari
Misha does not. Misha is absolutely not on the play of people to cook.
Hallie
[Incredulous.] Hopper can cook. Please.
Tom
I mean Xoc can cook, but I’m not sure it’s what other people would call cooking.
Kyle
Xoc, what’s on the menu for tonight?
Tom
Well, like—
Ari
Rat.
Tom
He sets some snares for some harebits.
Emily
[Giggling.] Harebits.
Hallie
I hate it.
Emily
They’re little toupees!
Hallie
It sounds like bits of hair. Why did you name it that?
Tom
[Scoffs.] It’s too late now. I can’t undo who I am. Anyway, they’re currently roasting over a fire. There isn’t much more to it than that. Like, the meat is clean so that it’s not just biting into animal carcass, but you know.
Kyle
[Relieved.] Okay.
Tom
It’s just like, roasted game.
Kyle
Alright. I’m assuming everyone’s polite about it except for Ness who just either loves it or claims to hate it.
Hallie
Ness… hates it.
Tom
[Laughs.]
Hallie
[Laughs.] He doesn’t need to eat, he just likes to do it. He likes snacks and naps. So he will look at the harebit and go,
Hallie (as Ness)
The fuck is this?
Tom (as Xoc)
It’s a pretty common animal to find out here. I use to catch these all the time when I was wandering on my great journey west across these plains.
Hallie (as Ness)
I mean yeah, I know that.
[0:35:00]
Why is it over a fire, here, as if we’re going to eat it?
[Giggling.]
Tom (as Xoc)
[Crushed.] Because we are.
Hallie (as Ness)
I never thought I’d miss the boat.
Kyle
[Laughs.]
Tom
Xoc just makes that pouty, like, Dipper face.
Emily
Elee says,
Emily (as Elee)
It’s not that bad.
Emily
And then mouths,
Emily (as Elee)
It’s that bad.
Emily
[Grinning.] Whenever Xoc turns his face.
Hallie
Ness mouths back a very exaggerated,
Hallie (as Ness)
I know, right?!
Emily
[Laughs.]
Kyle
Except he accidentally says it out loud.
[Laughter.]
This disaster, it just happens every night. This is every night.
Hallie
Every single one.
Tom
Does Hopper know how to cook?
Hallie
Hopper knows how to cook. Hopper’s already a chef man. He’s good at cooking. It’s not an official skill, just something I imagine he’s good at.
Ari
I want to say that Misha would probably be the only one that unironically compliments the food that Xoc cooks.
Emily
[Suppressed laughing.]
Hallie
Do we let Misha cook? Honest question.
Ari
Do you want to let Misha cook?
Hallie
[Laughing and wincing.] Not really.
Kyle
Is it like a cycle?
Emily
Oh yeah. Do we rotate in rounds?
Kyle
Rotate, and everyone just dreads Misha day.
Emily
Everyone dreads every day that’s not Hopper’s day.
Tom
Heh-heh-heh.
Hallie
It should be specified also that Ness doesn’t actually dislike Hop, he just is a dick about saying words, but he does like Hop a little bit more after Hop’s cooking night because Hopper has spices and herbs in a little pouch in his bag.
[Laughter.]
Kyle
Yeah. So, it’s a delight, and as much as Misha hates cooking they can’t help but know that dinner time is a delight.
Ari
Yeah.
Kyle
Although, that might just be because it’s so much better than the loneliness after.
[Somber music begins, with a hollow and empty feeling.]
After dinner ends and the fire goes out, everyone nestles into bed. I’m not sure why the quietness bothers you, Misha. It might be because there’s no one there. It might just be because this is such an unfamiliar space, or it might be because you’re stuck with the new memories that feel like strangers in your mind.
It was a peculiar thing that happened when Misha fully stepped into the Datasphere in order to become the patron for the Prodigious. For just that short period of time they remembered everything: every moment, every feeling, every person was all there, and now that Misha’s separated, bits and pieces have stayed, but the only thing they really remember is that they did remember.
Not quite entirely. As I said, there are a few things that Misha remembered, which by coincidence, gave Misha two new abilities and one new skill. Misha, what are your new abilities and skill?
Ari
Well, so actually, I would say that the skill did not happen because of that.
Kyle
Okay.
Ari
So I am now trained in Bug Handling. I was thinking that during some of the times that Misha was trying to just basically avoid the silence and loneliness that comes when everybody’s just asleep, they started playing more with their ants and trying to teach them little tricks, like go fetch a little leaf seed for their ants. It’s a little bit hard, but they just try to make them more, like, do little things and tricks.
Kyle
So wait, when you told them to fetch, were you playing fetch or were you playing the card game Go Fetch?
Ari
[Smiling.] Both.
Kyle
Okay.
Ari
Sometimes it was playing the card game Go Fetch. That didn’t work as well. Fetching was a little bit easier because sometimes ants like carrying things, and so they could literally put some sweet on it and the ants just carry it to the ball of ants which was their home. And then later when Hop gave Misha the ant farm they trained them into going into the little slide or going back and forth and things like that. So I want because of that to get the skill of Bug Handling, which is probably not going to be really useful but I think that is very fitting for Misha.
Kyle
I love it. I love it so much. What are the other two?
Ari
Well, one is… I guess it’s called Talk to the Datasphere but 2.0? I don’t know what the exact name of it is.
Kyle
Basically for Ari’s focus, her Tier 5 ability we gave her at Tier 1, so we just made a new Tier 5 ability. [Laughs.]
Ari
Yes, which basically is improved to what they already do, but instead of just googling things they can actually open communication with some instance of stratic life for a short period of time, so it’s a bit like what Xoc does with the nano spirits but with like a random piece of thing in the Datasphere, and they can ask them one thing, right? They can either answer or not depending on what they are asking.
Kyle
Yeah, and they’ll actually stick around for as long as you want for the remainder of that scene or that episode. Typically we’ll probably get rid of them after a scene. It all depends.
[0:40:00]
Ari
Yeah.
Kyle
But basically yeah, where Xoc can only talk with the Nano Spirits, now that Misha has really re-forged that connection with the Datasphere they are able to basically talk to anyone. If they try to talk with a specific- If they’re like “I want to talk to Xoc’s Nano Spirits,” that’s gonna be some work, otherwise if they wanna talk to like a plumber they can talk to a plumber ghost.
Ari
Is the famous plumber, Mario Mario, in the room?
Kyle
Basically Misha can phone a friend, but it doesn’t have to be just the spirits that Xoc talks to, so they might be more agreeable.
Kyle and Ari
Maybe.
Ari
It depends on how agreeable Kyle is that day.
Hallie
[Chuckles.]
Kyle
Mario Mario does not have a very verbose vocabulary.
[Grinning at himself.] So, you can talk to the Datasphere. What’s the other thing you can do?
Ari
The other thing is also related to whatever Misha remembered. Which, it’s funny, because they don’t really remember exactly what it was but they just know that some of the things just made them really angry and anxious really, and that kind of is manifesting into this new thing. I basically just wanted them to blow up and just leave them alone. So because of that they have this new ability called Concussion in which they can cause a pulse of concussive force to explode out from a point they choose within long range.
[Squeaky with excitement.] The pulse extends out in all directions up to short range, and everything in the area takes 5 points of damage, and even if I fail the attack roll, targets in the area take 1 point of damage, so it’s just a grenade.
Kyle
Misha can explode and hurt everyone around them.
[With deliberate emphasis.] Everyone.
Tom
[Chuckles.]
Ari
I can pick a point. I can pick a point! And explode it! It’s so fun!
Tom
Just shell people from long range.
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Kyle
So, Misha is not doing that tonight. Misha is feeling kind of disoriented though. One of the weird things about going through The Beyond is that every time you hit a major site it’s like déjà vu but worse. You feel like you should know where you are, and you feel like you do know where you are, but you also can’t put any words to it.
Ari
Ooh boy.
Kyle
So going by the water perk was not a fun time. And then you just keep seeing that damn astronaut.
[Tense space-like music begins.]
Because as you said, you’re trying to push something away, and as you have these memories you can’t get a clear emotion out of them or a clear memory, but in all of them you keep seeing this figure that looks like a mix between an astronaut and a racecar driver and like a pit crew.
Ari
Interesting.
Tom
[Exhales in awe.]
Kyle
So it’s like, it’s an astronaut with overalls.
Ari
Oh god.
Kyle
And then like lines of color.
Ari
Why is this person.
Kyle
And the thing is that sometimes it feels painful, sometimes it feels comforting, you don’t understand how to feel about it, and you don’t know how it feels about you.
[Tense music fades.]
Ari
Hmm.
Kyle
How does Misha spend the night alone?
Ari
Um. I guess usually Misha would spend nights alone before by just exploring the surroundings or whatever, but they don’t like doing that anymore because they don’t actually want to be away from people. So, I was thinking that either they spend it with their balls of ants or whatnot, sometimes they try to see if they can find more information on these quasi-memories I guess that they are getting just by looking at random stuff in the Datasphere, but it’s kind of frustrating because they really are not getting anything. And also, they don’t really know if they want to know, so sometimes when they think that there’s something that might help them figure out what it is they kind of just… not search it. That’s kind of how they spend it, just looking at things, and yeah.
Kyle
Memories can haunt you, man. You know, just like how Ness’s memory of Xoc beating him in Go Fetch is causing him to toss and turn in his sleep tonight.
Emily
Aw.
Kyle
Eventually he just wakes up with a start.
Hallie (as Ness)
That’s not a pair!
Kyle
[Laughs.] As you get up, Ness, and your eye, because you only have the one now—
Hallie
Yeah. He’s got, he’s been wearing that, it changes sometimes. Sometimes it’s an ascot, sometimes it’s like a sideways sash, sometimes it’s an eyepatch, sometimes it’s just a headband. It depends on his mood. Right now it’s an eyepatch.
Ari
I love it.
Hallie
Or he was wearing it over both eyes like a sleeping mask and now it’s one eye.
Emily
[Giggles.]
Ari
Oh my god.
Tom (as Xoc)
Your eye is fixed under there.
Tom
Xoc doesn’t say, because he’s not in this scene, but he would if he could.
Hallie
I’m sure he has several times and Ness has been “nope.”
Tom
[Laughs.]
Kyle
Well, your one eye, for someone it would open up, for Ness’s it sparks with life and basically how bright it is is how open his eyes are.
Hallie
Uh-huh.
Kyle
Because it’s little lightbulbs. It brights up.
[Buzzing noise like power turning on.]
You look around alarmed. It’s like waking up from a nightmare when you’re falling, because it feels like your world is falling down around you.
[0:45:00]
as you’re about to get ready for bed, you notice Misha just—
Ari
I wanna say that Misha is kinda sitting by where most of everybody is and it seems like they want to go and just look around and explore the place, but they also don’t want to necessarily do it, so it’s when like you’re restless because you know, oh, I want to be over there but I can’t, like when you tell a kid “you’re not supposed to go there,” blah, but they really wanna go. They’re just like fidgeting a lot.
Hallie
Ness is kind of rubbing his eyes. He doesn’t need to. He’s just rubbing his eyes to wake up a little bit. He looks at Misha and goes,
Hallie (as Ness)
What, you gotta pee? What’s the matter with you?
Kyle
[Chuckles.]
Ari (as Misha)
Oh! Hello, friend Ness. I had not noticed you were up. Uh… No, no-no, I do not need to do such things. I just, I am sorry if I woke you up.
Hallie (as Ness)
Nah, nah, Xoc woke me up.
Hallie
Glares daggers at Xoc’s sleeping form.
[Laughter.]
Ari
I would like to imagine that Xoc is just completely still, just like—[Laughs.]
Hallie
Just not moving at all.
Kyle
Maybe like the thing where you’re so out your mouth is just wide open.
Ari
[Smiling.] Yeah, I was thinking that! Yeah. Misha will look at Xoc and say,
Ari (as Misha)
Oh. Well, that is quite a feat for Xoc.
[Someone snorts and suppresses laughter.]
I don’t see him moving a lot. But in any case, it’s fine, you can go back. I just… There’s a lot of things in my mind, and sometimes I just get a little bit restless.
Hallie
Ness gets up. They don’t have a mini fridge, but if they did he’d be rustling through it for any kind of snack but preferably leftover patsa. Because he doesn’t have a mini fridge he also just kinda starts walking.
Ari
I’m glad, because Misha probably would have scorned at any food snack.
Kyle
There was a mini fridge. We don’t talk about the mini fridge adventure.
Ari
[Giggling.] That’s also in Patreon Land.
[Upbeat commercial music returns.]
Tom
[Weakly and sleepily.] Support us on Patreon…
Ari
What is in the mini fridge? Become a patron to find out!
Kyle
How does a mini fridge become a mini friend, become a mini enemy?
Hallie
So Ness, after realizing there’s just nothing good around, will ask Misha,
[Commercial music fades.]
Hallie (as Ness)
Why don’t you sleep? It’s so fun, Misha. It’s so great.
Ari (as Misha)
I don’t know if I can, really. I’ve never done it.
Hallie (as Ness)
You ever tried?
Ari (as Misha)
I guess I have tried to lay still sometimes and close my eyes like humans do. I mean, sometimes I guess I drift off a bit, but nothing like that.
Ari
And they will point at Xoc, who is like… [Laughs.]
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Ari (as Misha)
How do you do it?
Hallie (as Ness)
[Curtly.] What?
Ari (as Misha)
How do you do it? I mean, I know you’re a different type of machine, but you do sleep. So, did you have to learn it or did you just knew it?
Hallie (as Ness)
Meh. I just, I just… I let the air take me.
Kyle
[Laughs.]
Hallie (as Ness)
It’s nice. You know, it’s like you’re tired of dealing with people and then if you’re asleep you just don’t have to. It’s amazing. And then, when you wake up, maybe they’re gone. That’s the best possible outcome.
[Laughter.]
Ari
Misha will look scared at that.
Ari (as Misha)
I do not want them to be gone when I, if I sleep and then I wake up, I don’t want people to be gone. I… I guess maybe that’s why I don’t do it.
Hallie (as Ness)
You’re like afraid people will be gone?
Ari (as Misha)
[Emotional notes play.]
[Hesitantly.] Yes… I mean, um, sometimes I like to walk around and explore things, but lately I’m too scared and maybe I will get lost and maybe I won’t find my way back to everybody else, and what if they are just, they just leave and they don’t realize that I’m still wandering off…
[Notes stop.]
Hallie (as Ness)
Well, I don’t think you have to worry about this group just leaving, and I don’t know you that well but you seem a lot more capable than Xoc at least.
[Laughter.]
So you probably wouldn’t get lost. You’ve got like maps in your brain, right?
Ari (as Misha)
Yes, I do. I suppose I do. I just, I do not know. This place is really strange. Sometimes I feel like I have been here before and I don’t know if I will just get confused if I wander by myself for too long, so I cannot risk just leaving, or sleeping. What if I also get lost while I try to do that?
Hallie (as Ness)
You mean like dreams?
Ari (as Misha)
[Unsure.] I guess?
Hallie (as Ness)
Nightmares? Look, I just had one where Xoc beat me in Go Fetch, which is weird because that happened today and I don’t know how he got good at the game.
Ari (as Misha)
Well yes, I think so, because for what I understand nightmares are just, part of them are bad memories for what I have heard. That’s what I don’t want to have.
Hallie (as Ness)
Well, lucky for you, I am a world class boxer.
Hallie
And he will do those little, like, what are they? [Flails and shouts with effort.] Ahhh!
Tom
[Putting on a macho voice.] “Put up your dukes, bird!”
Hallie
[Laughs.] Yeah, exactly. He does that, hopping on one little boot leg.
Kyle
It’s a boxer pose for anyone listening.
Tom
1920s boxer.
Kyle
Yeah, there we go.
Hallie
And he’s like,
Hallie (as Ness)
I am good at a lot of things and this is one of them, so if you want,
[0:50:00]
[Gentle, tranquil music begins.]
Hallie
And then he plops down in front of Misha.
Hallie (as Ness)
I won’t go anywhere.
Ari
Misha will smile and say,
Ari (as Misha)
Oh, I would love that, if you stay and just maybe talked for a bit, Ness. Thank you.
Ari
And then after a little bit of silence Misha will just turn to Ness and say,
Ari (as Misha)
Did you know… I was a whole ship?!
Ari
And look really excited about it.
Tom
[Coughs from suppressing laughter.]
Hallie (as Ness)
I mean, I was there, but no!
Kyle
And so, a bit of the ways into the trip, the nights Misha had were no longer so lonely. Misha didn’t learn how to sleep, learn how to dream, but when they had a friend to spend each night with them that wasn’t necessary anymore. They couldn’t remember many things about their life, and knowing that it was just out of reach would stay frustrating, but they remembered what it was like to make and have a friend, and that was more than enough.
[Tranquil music plays out for a while and softly fades.]
Tom
Also, I have been laughing on and off through this entire thing because I looked back at the Aziraphale equations meme and I didn’t realize when I first shared it how simple most of them are. [Growing in mirth.] The first one is just the area and circumference of a circle.
Hallie
[Laughs.]
Tom
The second one’s just the volume of a cone and volume of a cylinder. He’s so confused and upset!
Tom
What does happen to El and Mike in Season 3 of Stranger Things?
Ari
Oh no, it’s just that they’re very annoying at the beginning.
Kyle
Mike’s a little shithead.
Hallie
Yeah, he is.
Ari
They’re just… ugh.
Hallie
It’s true. Like, everybody’s complaints about them are legitimate.
Ari
There was like,
[In a mocking voice.] “Oh, we’re leaving to do our own thing, over here~!”
Hallie
Constantly.
Ari
All the time, but it’s very… bad. I don’t know.
Hallie
Which like, it felt like a natural thing for them, you know?
Tom (as Xoc)
I’m not sure that things would work quite that way between machines.
Emily (as Elee)
[Nervously.] Well- Well-
Tom (as Xoc)
Machines don’t, generally speaking, produce offspring that way.
Hallie
Hopper gestures at Xoc and then looks back at Misha, like “see?”
Ari (as Misha)
I do not know if I am capable of this. I have yet to test it.
Tom
Oh no. Oh, the dark fanfics we just spawned right now in that moment.
[Laughter.]
[In a sinister voice.] Save some room for Kaladin.
Calaval, fuck.
[Giggling.]
Tom (as Xoc)
[Upset.] Because we are.
Ari
Oh my god.
Kyle
[Laughs.]
Ari
Because I am!
Hallie
[Laughing.] Because I am! [Drum crash effect with mouth.]
[Laughter.]
Tom
[Distraught.] Ohh, no, no, no! [Short pause] No!
